Last week we were all captivated by the images in the Atlanta Journal Constitution of a white dad — Clifton Green — who learned to take care of his adopted Ethiopian daughter’s hair. (Click this link for the AJC slideshow: http://projects.ajc.com/gallery/view/living/braids/) I was so amazed that I tracked Clifton down and asked if he would do a BGLH interview. He agreed! Clifton is a professor at Emory University in Atlanta, Georgia. He has shared his personal photos of him and his daughter, Miriam. He did all the styles you see on his baby girl!
Clifton: Let me first speak as a white adoptive parent of a black child. We know that love alone is not enough to raise our daughter. She will have experiences as a black person that we can’t relate to as white parents, and we need to reach out to the black community to help us raise our daughter into a woman that is proud of her culture and heritage. We live in Atlanta, and we have black friends in our lives and go to a church that is roughly half black, but we didn’t anticipate the support we’ve received from the online community. It’s been really nice.
BGLH: First off, we thought it was cute that you were using a fork. I’m assuming it doubled as a comb?
Clifton: I used to use a fork to make Miriam’s parts. The rat tail comb I had at first wasn’t very pointy and I was more happy with the fork. I thought it made nice, sharp parts. I have a better rat tail comb now and I’ve gotten used to it so I’ve done away with the fork.
BGLH: How often do you do your daughter’s hair? And how long does it take?
Clifton: On average we wash her hair every 10 days, but sometimes it’s once a week or every two weeks depending on what we’ve done that week (like playing in the pool or the sand box). I often re-do the braids or twists during the week depending on how they’re looking (smaller braids last longer) .
BGLH: Where/how did you learn how to take care of her hair? Why did you learn to take care of her hair?
Clifton: We’ve always had black babysitters, and I loved it when Miriam’s hair started getting long enough for our babysitter to braid or twist (Miriam came home at 1 year old with very little hair). Our babysitter moved away and our new sitter wasn’t comfortable doing hair, and I missed how nice Miriam’s hair looked. My wife and I started doing it but gradually over time it became my thing, at least partially because we also had a baby boy that my wife was breastfeeding. We learned from books like “It’s All Good Hair,” from other moms, and of course practice which I’m still doing. Our goal has always been to help her fit in among other black girls and to feel good about her hair. I’m not an expert, and we’re always open to advice and suggestions :)
BGLH: Emotionally, how was the process of learning to take care of her hair? Was it ever frustrating or discouraged? Or was it a joy?
Clifton: Learning about hair care and styles has been a joy. Sometimes the doing can be frustrating :) I would say the worst has been my attempt at cornrows. They look like they’re two weeks old as soon as I do them, and when I spend an hour or longer on her hair I want it to look perfect. So I haven’t tried them for awhile.
BGLH: If you could describe your daughters afro textured hair in three words, what would they be?
Clifton: Curly, coily, bouncy.
BGLH: I’m assuming you’ve been around caucasian hair all your life. This may be a kind of silly question, but what to you, is the most striking difference between the texture of your daughters hair, and the hair you were used to?
Clifton: I would say perhaps the most striking difference is how dry her hair can get. In my experience, white people’s hair tends to get oily between washings; with Miriam her hair dries out instead.
BGLH: Do you find anything uniquely beautiful about afro-textured hair?
Clifton: My favorite is the way it looks with two strand twists. It seems uniquely black and beautiful to me.
BGLH: Do you think the care you take in nurturing your daughter’s hair is having an effect on her self image? If so, in what way?
Clifton: Miriam is 5. Right now I think we’re laying the groundwork for when she’s older and starts to think about her identity as a woman of color and what that means.
BGLH: And finally, I saw you have a young son. What does he think of his big sister’s hair :)
Clifton: Our non-adopted son is 4, and although we have discussions about skin color (they refer to it as brown skin and yellow skin), we haven’t talked much hair specifically. Although he says it’s beautiful sometimes, right now I would say he loves Miriam’s hair mainly because he gets to watch TV when I fix it. He also likes for Miriam to fix his hair with her barrettes and hair balls, and he’ll sit still to let her do that. Our 2 year old son also enjoys Miriam’s hair stylings. We’re on the wait list to adopt again from Ethiopia (another girl). So I’ll have more chances to practice my skills, and hopefully the girls can appreciate each others hair and practice styling on each other as they grow up.
I was so impressed when I saw this story, I appreciate him not putting a relaxer in it but doing research. This is what my mom did because it was the norm and now I wish I never had it. I think he is a role model and since his has a little publicity, he needs to head over to Brad and Angelina's house. Angelina wants a doll that has hair like her daughters but her daughter would love her hair if it looked liked this little girl's. I want hair like this little girl's and she is only five. This is a inspirational story.
Oh it was such a delight reading this story. It is wonderful to see the father not only take care but take interest in his daughters hair and the life she leads now and will lead as a Black/African-American women in this world. Not to mention is two-strand twist look A-MA-ZING!!! he should open a shop lol.
This is truly an amazing story…but in contrast there is a video circulating online which presents a case of what some would deem child abuse in which a black mother using expletive language is harshly combing her daughter's natural hair. When you have these two stories in mind..one has to wonder what will it take to educate some parents on how to care for their daughter's natural hair? Obviously, as in the case of this professor, one must be willing to learn and accept the natural aspects of the child (specifically the hair and its texture among other things). It would be interesting to see bglh do a cover on that story(the one with the woman combing her daughter's hair) back to back with this current one. but overall I applaude his fervor in promoting his daughter's love for self and all things beautiful and brown
Wow. Im in awe with this interview I am so happy that the child is blessed to have parents like Professor Green. I'm just so speechless and happy right now. Wow.
this is an amazing story :] i love that they want her to have knowledge of her background and to be proud of it!
wonderful parents :]
Lovely interview.
BEAUTIFUL!! and lol @ the fork thing…I was slightly confused at first when I saw it. Great interview.
wow, this is such a great idea!I really enjoyed the interview. If a white man can learn to take care of his black daughter's hair why are black mothers still perming thir daughter's hair at 3 yrs old..just sayin..
http://womanofcolour.blogspot.com
"one has to wonder what will it take to educate some parents on how to care for their daughter's natural hair? Obviously, as in the case of this professor, one must be willing to learn and accept the natural aspects of the child (specifically the hair and its texture among other things)"
So true! I think that this is issue with most parents that don't want to learn how to do natural hair. It takes time to learn something that they probably never knew especially if they've been relaxed all their life.
I love this interview, I wish that my mother would have had the patience for my natural hair (and my sisters) instead of slapping on a relaxer to make it "manageable"
@anon – I have seen that video and it is quite traumatising.
I have to say that I wouldn't like to see it featured on BGLH following this piece because undoubtedly comparisons on a race level would be made that wouldn't necessarily be true.
I would love to see more positive examples instead. Perhaps like the youtube 'family going natural' or other fotkis where parents feature their children.
I think showing positive examples is the way forward.
great job, one of the best interviews yet!
like patrica said before me, it makes you wonder why some black women are still relying on the box perm to do their daughters hair.
This was such a wonderful interview. It's great to hear his perspective!
cornrows are hard for many lol. maybe he should try parting them smaller if he wants them to be neater. I think that twists last longer and look cuter anyway, but if he wanted to try again that's be my tip.
this whole family is so beautiful! yay!
Bravo, BGLH! Fantastic interview and touching story.
@ Jc… I agree with you 100%! I watched that video, of the mom abusing her daughter's hair, and I don't want it on BGLH. I do feel that positivity is the way forward. We already know a lot of black people have issues with their hair. I'd rather discuss solutions.
And you're also right that the point of this story IS NOT to say that white people love afro textured hair more than black people do (Claire from the Fashion Bomb just came on BGLH with strong evidence that that is NOT the case on a macro level!)
I honestly don't buy the mentality that seeking white people's acceptance of our hair is somehow the way forward. It isn't.
BLACK PEOPLE need to learn to accept THEIR OWN HAIR. THAT is the way forward!
This is simply a touching and powerful story. If we could stay away from the race scripts (white people=nice, black people=bad), that would be great. Let's just appreciate the fatherly love this man has shown his daughter.
Love it. This is a great story.
I'm so happy you did this interview. Her hair looks awesome. I think he does a good job.
Love it! Great interview. Thanks for tracking him down. When I initially heard this story, I definitely wanted more. Good one L.
Simply put…LOVE LOVE LOVE it!
This is such a lovely story! The fact that he took the time to learn how to care for her hair in its natural state shows how much he loves her and wants her to love and appreciate the way God made her!
I want the father of my children to learn how to do the same, regardless of his ethnicity!
Another great interview and such a touching story too. You can feel the love from the interview!!!!