“I think most people still don’t understand that it’s truly just hair. They still project their fears and insecurities onto others- that it’s not possible to look good with short hair, that having long hair is so crucial to beauty, that one shouldn’t rock the boat when blessed with ‘good hair’. We need to move past this, seriously, hair is only hair… Short or long hair doesn’t change who you are…” ~Zara
So I’ve featured Zara several times on the blog. And it’s always been with hair. For example;
But she recently chopped all her hair off. I talked to her about her decision.
BGLH: Your cut is gorgeous!! Why’d you do it? What sparked it?
Zara: Thanks!! I was hoping it would come out okay, and thank heavens it did! I’d been considering chopping all my hair off for a while, it was either that or go blonde. I tried blonde and it came out as ginger (!) but I got a great cut out of it, so I was pretty happy.
After a few weeks, I realized that I’m way too lazy to take care of delicate hair. Poofy [Zara's name for her hair] is normally strong as can be (obviously, since she never fell out on her own, despite the color), but with all the processing, she needed more care than I was willing to give. I’ll say though, she wasn’t damaged, just more delicate and I could tell that I was a few steps away from having damaged hair if I didn’t start moisturizing her more, doing more deep conditioning, etc. But like I said, I hate having to do a lot to maintain my hair, especially as I never had to do much back when she wasn’t colored. I’m spoiled, lol. So, I had fun with the color and the cut, then I chopped it all off.
BGLH: Who did the cut for you?
Zara: My dear fiance, Lobster, busted out the clippers and went to town on it. He was mostly worried that I wouldn’t like it, but afterwards, he said he could see how happy it made me, and he was glad I did it. In fact, he finds that his hands keep rubbing my head involuntarily- I think he’s having more fun with it than I am.
The other day, he tried to convince me to go skinhead! According to him, “not many men can say that they shaved their woman’s head”. I kindly refused, lol, he’s become clipper/razor- happy.
BGLH: You told me that the cut sparked controversy; Why, and from whom?
Zara: From some of my family, first of all. I didn’t tell many people I was going to do it, just because I knew I’d hear the same arguments from when I did my first big chop- your hair is so nice, why cut it, it’s too extreme, etc. My mother allegedly had sleepless nights when she found out- cutting hair is a sign of psychological turmoil to her, I believe. I got some messages commending me to the Lord from her, lol.
I think most people still don’t understand that it’s truly just hair. They still project their fears and insecurities onto others- that it’s not possible to look good with short hair, that having long hair is so crucial to beauty, that one shouldn’t rock the boat when blessed with ‘good hair’. We need to move past this, seriously, hair is only hair. It grows back. Short or long hair doesn’t change who you are, it’s just a transient characteristic.
BGLH: Is the plan to keep it short, or will you grow it out again?
Zara: I intend to grow it out again, I miss having Poofy in ridiculously large power afros. Once she got colored, her texture became more spiral, which most people would love. But it also meant that she flopped down and grew down instead of out. I don’t want spiral curls that gently fall to my shoulders, that’s not me. I want big strong hair that grows up to the sky, nappy as can be =)
BGLH: I know you are getting married soon… what’s the wedding hair going to be?
Zara: Well, the wedding’s in a year, but I’ve been told that time flies like you wouldn’t believe. The hair will be pretty simple actually, I’ve got a ridiculous amount of jewelry for the wedding because I’m getting married in a sari (my mum’s tradition) and there’s quite some bling scheduled in the outfit. I’ll need a style with a center part because part of my jewelry is a tikka piece that goes on the center part down to the forehead.
A tikka piece
I still want the fro out in some form, so the front of my hair will be slicked down and the rest can explode from the back :) I’ll have pictures of the wedding jewelry up at
http://purplelacegloves.blogspot.com/
BGLH: Our graphic designer Shari is considering doing a big chop. Any advice for her?
Zara: Go for it. If I had the choice between transitioning from long straight hair to long natural hair, I would pass. I’ve had so much fun with short natural hair, with the freedom of not having to stress about styling, jumping in and out of the shower, having people notice exactly how pretty your face is, lol. And I’ve seen Shari’s pictures, she’d look great with short hair. It’s a lot easier to adjust than you’d think, and you learn to love yourself for yourself, not because of rocking long hair or whatever.
I read in her interview that she’s been told that her hair is her beauty. I’ll be frank, honey, that’s some bullsh*t. Who you are on the inside is your beauty, not what grows on your head. Bump those dudes that tell you you’re not beautiful without your hair, because you are. Having natural hair is about being free, free from those who say that straight hair is better, that long hair is better, free to be yourself without other people forcing their ideas of beauty on you. Let go of the fear and cut off those relaxed ends!! You know we all got your back. It’s a good journey to be on, growing out your hair. I wouldn’t be doing it a second time if I didn’t believe that.
Amen! Zara is an AMAZING blogger and you can find out more about her hair escapades at http://leaveinthekinks.blogspot.com
