if your relaxed hair is long and thick, why go natural? | Black Girl with Long Hair Black Girl with Long Hair | Natural Hair Styles and Natural Hair Care

15 September 2009 ~ 49 Comments

if your relaxed hair is long and thick, why go natural?

Question of the Day


Thursday I’ll feature Chime (pictured above), who had long, thick relaxed hair and opted to transition to natural hair. These stories always intrigue me, because hair damage/lack of hair growth is usually the reason women choose to go natural.

This weekend I was hanging out with a relaxed friend of mine who has thick, shiny long hair. She mentioned that her ends are perpetually split/damaged and have been the entire time she’s been relaxed, requiring her to get frequent trims. But I know naturals deal with their own damage.

So those of you who had long/decent looking/relatively healthy relaxed hair; why did you go natural?

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49 Responses to “if your relaxed hair is long and thick, why go natural?”

  1. Moni 15 September 2009 at 4:58 am Permalink

    My relaxed hair went through cycles of breakage mixed with cycles of healthiness, but I originally wanted to go natural and eventually went natural when it was seemingly healthy and almost the longest its ever been. In retrospect, it wasn't that long (at least not compared to some of the women I've seen), but it was long to me and length wasn't ever a consideration for going natural. I love the beauty and versatility of natural hair and wanted to embrace my natural hair in all its uniqueness. I also had several natural role models who really inspired me, though they probably never knew it. Best thing I could have done for my hair!

    Reply
  2. luvmylocs 15 September 2009 at 5:23 am Permalink

    i had nice, longer, fuller hair that i often roller set when i decided to go natural. i went to a place here in houston where there were tons of naturals, short naturals, longer naturals, locs, braids, etc. (it was an eric jerome dickey book signing at the shrine of the black madonna). i was in natural heaven. it was at that moment that i decided that i wanted to be free of the relaxer and trying to keep it straight. i always liked fuller "big" hair anyway. i never wore a wrap "flat" style. i always set it and loved it big. that was 10 years ago. to me this just feels right.

    relaxed hair is always going to be thinner than your natural hair. i think if your relaxed hair wasn't really damaged when you decided to go natural that just puts you a little bit ahead in terms of haircare and retaining length. you probably already know some bad habits to avoid. you make a good point though, being natural doesn't mean you take good care of your hair or that it's just growing like a weed and sometimes i think when you're relaxed you're more diligent about your routine than you are when you're natural and a routine is key for growth and retaining what you grow.

    Reply
  3. Alana 15 September 2009 at 9:24 am Permalink

    I was going on APL with relaxed hair. I sudden;y began to love the idea of curls but they never came out the way I wanted or lasted as long as I wanted. I had a lot of shedding but nothing that wasn't manageable I suppose. After starting to look for ways to make my relaxed hair healthy I kept coming across beautiful natural heads and transitioners.
    I think the thought never occured to me that I could go back to natural AND be able to take care of my own hair.
    That was enough…

    Reply
  4. Lee 15 September 2009 at 11:40 am Permalink

    I had healthy hair/thick hair and I decided to go natural because, I just didn't like having to go to the hair salon every 3 months…and I really wanted to live a healthier lifestyle.

    Reply
  5. Lita 15 September 2009 at 12:32 pm Permalink

    i had long, fast growing and thick relaxed hair (not without periods of breakage, but it always looked fine). at its longest it was mid back. however, i started cutting it into a chin length bob. after a while, i realised i didn't prefer straight hair. i hated hairdressers, and was soon to be a student, so decided to release myself from the bondage.

    Reply
  6. ?Beauty is in the eye of the Beholder? 15 September 2009 at 12:34 pm Permalink

    Well i personally was ready for a change it was more of a I need to do this for me and I just wanted really strong healthy hair. I wanted to give recognition to my roots as well.

    Reply
  7. ?Beauty is in the eye of the Beholder? 15 September 2009 at 12:34 pm Permalink

    Well i personally was ready for a change it was more of a I need to do this for me and I just wanted really strong healthy hair. I wanted to give recognition to my roots as well.

    Reply
  8. ?Beauty is in the eye of the Beholder? 15 September 2009 at 12:34 pm Permalink

    Well i personally was ready for a change it was more of a I need to do this for me and I just wanted really strong healthy hair. I wanted to give recognition to my roots as well.

    Reply
  9. ?Beauty is in the eye of the Beholder? 15 September 2009 at 12:34 pm Permalink

    Well i personally was ready for a change it was more of a I need to do this for me and I just wanted really strong healthy hair. I wanted to give recognition to my roots as well.

    Reply
  10. ?Beauty is in the eye of the Beholder? 15 September 2009 at 12:34 pm Permalink

    Well i personally was ready for a change it was more of a I need to do this for me and I just wanted really strong healthy hair. I wanted to give recognition to my roots as well.

    Reply
  11. ?Beauty is in the eye of the Beholder? 15 September 2009 at 12:34 pm Permalink

    Well i personally was ready for a change it was more of a I need to do this for me and I just wanted really strong healthy hair. I wanted to give recognition to my roots as well.

    Reply
  12. ?Beauty is in the eye of the Beholder? 15 September 2009 at 12:34 pm Permalink

    Well i personally was ready for a change it was more of a I need to do this for me and I just wanted really strong healthy hair. I wanted to give recognition to my roots as well.

    Reply
  13. Beautifully.Conjured.Up 15 September 2009 at 12:54 pm Permalink

    The main reason why I went natural was due to my hair breaking of from relaxers. The last straw was when the left side of my head of hair broke off so bad that I cried…not good.

    My hair used to be long and thick while relaxed, and I still admired natural-haired women, but I was afraid to go natural. Truthfully, had my hair still been long and thick with a relaxer, I probably would be relaxed right now…then again, I don't know b/c I work with NaOH (sodium hydroxide) from time to time on my job, and I hate it…so why put it in my hair??

    Reply
  14. Anonymous 15 September 2009 at 1:06 pm Permalink

    I had very healthy, long, relaxed hair. I went natural because I was tired of the chemicals and the trips to the salon. It was that simple. I'd see actresses like Gloria Rueben with their natural tresses and I loved it. I decided I wanted to see what my hair looked like without the chems. I had no idea what I was getting into or what the results would be and I didn't have naturals in my personal life who could offer inspiration, but I went for it anyway.

    Reply
  15. Anonymous 15 September 2009 at 1:33 pm Permalink

    I am going natural because I became OBSESSED with the texture of my new growth, and I want to see/DREAM of what my true texture looks like. And through this journey I have also embraced the idea that I too can be FIERCE and FASHIONABLE, which I and a lot of other black girls have been brain-washed into believing, can only be accomplished with straight hair or "mixed" girl hair.

    Reply
  16. True2me 15 September 2009 at 3:33 pm Permalink

    My natural texture isn't much different from my relaxed texture. Not only that, but my hair is relaxer resistant.

    I hate fussing over my hair…I do..I just want to have no fuss hair. I can blow it out straight when I want also.

    I still have a stigma attached w wearing it all natural tho..dont know how long this will last

    Reply
  17. nonotthejacket 15 September 2009 at 3:38 pm Permalink

    I had pretty healthy relaxed hair once I stopped putting so much heat in it and started pin-curling it at night instead. I started transitioning because I was posting on an entertainment blog where a lot of the posters were natural. It started me thinking about how my natural texture had been a source of self-hate for me since I was old enough to recognize the difference between my coils and kinks and all my cousin's looser and softer hair textures. So I decided I was too old to hold on to so much insecurity and took the plunge. I'm such a better, more confident person for taking the risk!

    Not to mention the fact that I don't have to get up at 6:30 in the morning anymore to beat the Saturday rush at the local Dominican salon, LOL!

    -First time, poster by the way! I've been lurking here for about a month or so since Gem and Karrie B. told me about the site.

    Reply
  18. QDTHEQT 15 September 2009 at 4:45 pm Permalink

    I had natural hair for 18 years, I would get it pressed though. Then one day after my cousin didn't feel like pressing it I let her put a perm in and regretted it ever since. I had long, healthy natural hair and I had long, healthy relaxed hair. After about 12 years of wearing my relaxed hair, I finally got brave enough to start over. I had never had short hair before and was a little uncertain about how it would be. well I loved it and I REALLY love being natural again. I like being able to show of Black women that's it's okay to wear our hair the way that God made it. It's beautiful! I always liked natural hair and I always liked my texture which is kinky coils. I thank my mom for never ever saying anything negative to me about hair when I was growing up. Plus, I have a daughter who is almost 8 months now and I want her to know that natural hair is gorgeous. So the best way for her to learn that is for me to show her. BTW my avatar pic is very old and from my relaxed days. Just been too lazy to change it over the years!

    Reply
  19. The Fashionstar 15 September 2009 at 6:47 pm Permalink

    I had thick hair and it was considered long, and right before I decided to go natural I really had my routine down so my straight hair was healthier and looked better than it ever had.

    But I was really starting to appreciate (instead of loathe) when my new growth would come in, I loved the curls and kinks. I was starting to really find natural hair beautiful, and I just wanted to see what my hair really looked like.

    I also was going through a period of utter self-acceptance. I was learning to accept the inner parts of myself, and eventually I just had a huge desire to be myself at all costs.

    I feel like I had been labeled for a lot of my life as the light-skinned girl with long hair, and I just felt like I never was whoever that label is. I guess I just wanted to truly accept myself and define my own image. Even though it's only hair going natural has helped me to express myself as an individual and to continue to have confidence in myself.

    Reply
  20. Tori D. 15 September 2009 at 8:27 pm Permalink

    This may seem pretty superficial, but really I just want a change. I'm blessed to have naturally thick hair that grows quickly, and fortunate to have a stylist that keeps it healthy. But I just want to try something different, and since I have no idea what my hair is like naturally (I've been permed since I was 3 or 4) I thought this would be intriguing. Plus I've seen so many beautiful natural hairstyles that I would love to try.

    Reply
  21. ?Bunny ? 15 September 2009 at 8:46 pm Permalink

    I joined a roller derby team and practice was intense–my whole head would be soaked with sweat, but when I came home, I didn't always have time to wash and style it because of the relaxer. As a result, it was always itchy and smelly which I hated. I also got tired of not being able to do the things I loved, like running in the rain and swimming.

    Reply
  22. ?Bunny ? 15 September 2009 at 8:46 pm Permalink

    I joined a roller derby team and practice was intense–my whole head would be soaked with sweat, but when I came home, I didn't always have time to wash and style it because of the relaxer. As a result, it was always itchy and smelly which I hated. I also got tired of not being able to do the things I loved, like running in the rain and swimming.

    Reply
  23. ?Bunny ? 15 September 2009 at 8:46 pm Permalink

    I joined a roller derby team and practice was intense–my whole head would be soaked with sweat, but when I came home, I didn't always have time to wash and style it because of the relaxer. As a result, it was always itchy and smelly which I hated. I also got tired of not being able to do the things I loved, like running in the rain and swimming.

    Reply
  24. ?Bunny ? 15 September 2009 at 8:46 pm Permalink

    I joined a roller derby team and practice was intense–my whole head would be soaked with sweat, but when I came home, I didn't always have time to wash and style it because of the relaxer. As a result, it was always itchy and smelly which I hated. I also got tired of not being able to do the things I loved, like running in the rain and swimming.

    Reply
  25. ?Bunny ? 15 September 2009 at 8:46 pm Permalink

    I joined a roller derby team and practice was intense–my whole head would be soaked with sweat, but when I came home, I didn't always have time to wash and style it because of the relaxer. As a result, it was always itchy and smelly which I hated. I also got tired of not being able to do the things I loved, like running in the rain and swimming.

    Reply
  26. ?Bunny ? 15 September 2009 at 8:46 pm Permalink

    I joined a roller derby team and practice was intense–my whole head would be soaked with sweat, but when I came home, I didn't always have time to wash and style it because of the relaxer. As a result, it was always itchy and smelly which I hated. I also got tired of not being able to do the things I loved, like running in the rain and swimming.

    Reply
  27. ?Bunny ? 15 September 2009 at 8:46 pm Permalink

    I joined a roller derby team and practice was intense–my whole head would be soaked with sweat, but when I came home, I didn't always have time to wash and style it because of the relaxer. As a result, it was always itchy and smelly which I hated. I also got tired of not being able to do the things I loved, like running in the rain and swimming.

    Reply
  28. Monet 15 September 2009 at 8:49 pm Permalink

    I cut off all my long, thick, jet black hair because I had begun to hate it. I'd considered going natural for a few years but never did because I felt my hair was my beauty. Finally, after a couple years in college, I felt ready to make the plunge. My hair had always been very healthy, thick and long. But it wasn't really me. I was always coveting curly hair, which was silly considering my natural hair was. Not to mention, I knew how harsh chemical relaxers were. So I did what seemed (mostly) sensible and felt right.

    I still miss the long flowing hair that I had, but it's getting back to that length and I definitely prefer my coils to straight flyaways.

    Reply
  29. The Fashionstar 15 September 2009 at 9:16 pm Permalink

    I forgot that I also became over getting those burns, one time I'd gone to the salon and this girl kept the relaxer on my head for like 25mins and was raking a comb through trying to get my hair bone straight. I wound up getting a burn bigger than a half dollar and it was oozing for like a week. I just couldn't keep going through ish like that!

    Reply
  30. Brownngirl. 15 September 2009 at 9:34 pm Permalink

    My hair was also long and healthy, but I went natural because I wanted to get rid of the perm! I hated the process of getting the relaxer, not being able to scratch my head for fear of getting burned… and then getting burned and having scabs anyway. And, honestly, the first time I used Nair, it struck me how much is smelled like perm, and it never sat well with me. Lol! I got my last relaxer in December 2003… I didn't bc, I did a gradual transition, and was fully natural by Early '05 (Yeah, I had a lot of patience.) I love the versatility of my natural hair and have yet to look back.

    Reply
  31. tgirl 15 September 2009 at 9:35 pm Permalink

    I went natural when I just couldn't stand fighting the weather plain and simple. As an east coaster, its dampness in the winter and humidity in the summer. No matter how relaxed my hair was it just wanted to be curly. Once I took up running for exercise forget about it! It was hell when the new growth started to make matters worse.
    I can't believe I've been natural for about 14 years. It wasn't very popular when I did but don't see myself ever going back anytime soon.

    Reply
  32. Anonymous 15 September 2009 at 9:36 pm Permalink

    Because I was done burning my scalp! LOL. But seriously, I would only relax 3-4 times a year anyway. I would wear my hair straight for 3-4 weeks, then (not realizing what it was called) I would rock cornrows and braidouts. I loved loved the big hair. I loved the texture , wildness, uniquness of it. I would constantly fondle my new growth, but i would go back to what i was "supposed" to do-relax. Ultimately, I just wanted a change. I was always the "lighstkinded one w/ long hair". I got tired of being defined and trapped by that. I wanted the strength and courage to chop it all off. I loved my permed hair, but now I realize I was never honestly comfortable. Originally i began researching locs, then stumbled upon the internet world of natural hair. The rest is history and I have never looked back!!

    Reply
  33. Anonymous 15 September 2009 at 9:46 pm Permalink

    My relaxed hair was very thick and has for the most part always been long and healthy but every so often i would experience nape breakage. This pushed me toward texlaxing for a 1yr.1/2 and after been intrigued with my texture i thought about going natural. Tried it for 5 mo and it was so much hair I texlaxed again. Now It’s been 9mos and boy is it not easy. Talk about dealing with the 3 different textures and the detangling…. and its just so much hair. I’m so overwhelmingly glad I found this site and a host of others to support this journey.

    Reply
  34. Adzua 15 September 2009 at 9:47 pm Permalink

    My relaxed hair was always long thick and relatively healthy. At the longest it was probably at the middle of back.

    I started to contemplate going natural because I'd always loved the look of braid-outs on my relaxed hair and grew tired of the high-maintenance regimen. Then, a bunch of girls on campus went natural and I loved their look! And their confidence. So, this summer, after nearly 8 months of transitioning, I cut my hair into a short bob and now it's the shortest I've ever had it. It was hard to take care of at first since some ends in the front are still relaxed, but I absolutely love it!
    Not gonna lie though…I can't wait until my hair is long again!

    Reply
  35. Faren 15 September 2009 at 11:21 pm Permalink

    I didn't go natural for aesthetic reasons. I had an epiphany. Just as I have long limbs, dark skin and big eyes; I am supposed to be natural. And this may be harsh, and Im def. not a natural nazi but I believe all woman should be comfortable with their hair's inherent nature. The imbalanced ratio of natural vs permed women is an indicative sign that we are still marred by dominant cultural influences—not hair manageability, not preferences…the imbalance is due to being affected by cultural influences…I'm just sayin'

    -Faren

    Reply
  36. Black girl with long hair 15 September 2009 at 11:56 pm Permalink

    wow… a lot of these responses are really deep!

    @ Bunny… it's so awesome that you're in a roller derby!!!! that is too cool!

    Reply
  37. Samara 16 September 2009 at 1:45 am Permalink

    Sometimes it's just a sense of wanting to be free. Free of the chemicals and the mindset that we have to alter our natural hair to be beautiful and accepted. I see nothing wrong with wanting to be true to yourself. I know that's why I chopped my long relaxed hair off. It was time to be free!

    Reply
  38. Neeci 16 September 2009 at 1:51 am Permalink

    I was past APL when I decided to go natural. My hair wasn't damaged – it was pretty healthy. My reasoning was because I'm "green" and using all this natural stuff on my skin but dumping a relaxer on my head felt like hypocrisy.

    Also, I had been relaxed since I was freakin' 2 years old. Every time I asked my mom (Nigerian), she would say, "It was, how do the Americans say it, nappy!"

    I remember being 6 months post and my dad saying something negative about my hair. Also a Nigerian, he was like, "I don't know much about hair, but you need to take care of that undergrowth."

    I took the negativity and ran with it.

    Transitioned 9 months. BCed in May. My hair's CBL now. :)

    Although, halfway through my transition, I reached BSL and was very hesitant about chopping. Then I said "Forget it" and cut my relaxed hair to SL, lol.

    Reply
  39. TheDailey 16 September 2009 at 4:39 am Permalink

    because i wanted to embrace my roots. natural is 100 times better. when i started going natural, my relaxed hair was actually at its best…
    but its just hair, chop chop chop :]

    Reply
  40. Anonymous 16 September 2009 at 6:43 am Permalink

    I didn't have really long hair (just past my shoulders) and it was kept in pretty good condition due to my low maintenance routine.
    I've always loved the look of natural hair, but I didn't stop relaxing because I figured I could rock it. I hated the entire process of getting my hair "done." That was strike one. Towards the end, no matter who did my relaxer, I started getting severe scalp burns. Strike two. Finally, I'm style-challenged as all get-out. My repertoire consisted of… a ponytail. That gets majorly boring and embarrassing after a while. And that's all she wrote for me.

    Reply
  41. Vixen 16 September 2009 at 11:39 am Permalink

    I seriously need a glossary for this site.

    What is CBL? And ABL?

    Thanks

    Reply
  42. Kicukalah 16 September 2009 at 1:09 pm Permalink

    I went natural because I needed a change. I felt as though all my life I have lived it according to how someone else thought it should be. The problem was I wasn't happy because I wasn't being myself and trust and believe you can't make people happy. So I always wanted to be natural and that's what I did. Not only natural but to the extent of locking my hair.
    My relaxed hair was down to the middle of my back. It was the longest it has ever been in my life, BUT I got tired of going through the torture of being chemically burned every single time.

    Reply
  43. Neeci 16 September 2009 at 4:57 pm Permalink

    Vixen, sorry.

    CBL = collar bone length.

    APL = armpit length.

    BSL = bra strap length.

    :)

    Reply
  44. Anonymous 16 September 2009 at 6:09 pm Permalink

    exactly! this is what i think to myself about these women, like my cousin for example, who is now embarking on going natural–and had great relaxed hair, albeit a bit thin, but with length, shine et al. i am natural and am always thinking about such folks: well if your hair is THAT lush, THAT full and has THAT length with a heap of chemicals in it—IMAGINE what such hair does WITHOUT it. wow. my cousin's hair is already loads thicker–can't wait to see what happens when she grows out the rest of the straightening.

    Reply
  45. Mazeratie 16 September 2009 at 10:01 pm Permalink

    With my relaxed hair I always felt like I was one slip/mistake away from major setback whenever I had to touch-up. No matter how careful I was there was always the occasional scalp burn. I hated the feeling of that relaxer run-off when it hit my shoulders or back, and the smell of the cream turned me off. I also felt like I had to constantly fuss over it and my natural hair, for me at least, is much less time consuming and just suits me better. Now that I've learned to flat iron my natural hair, I really don't see the need to relax again ever – I used to think a relaxer was necessary to get straight hair when I was in the mood, and now I know that that's simply not true.

    Reply
  46. Vixen 17 September 2009 at 5:20 am Permalink

    Thanks Neecie!

    Reply
  47. Tam 17 September 2009 at 12:47 pm Permalink

    Top 10 reasons I went natural

    1. I was tired of using diluted Liquid Drano on my scalp. There is something to be said about a product that makes you wear gloves on your hands to apply, yet it is “safe” enough to put on your head?!?!

    2. I got tired of not exercising. But at least I would be cute at the dialysis center.

    3. I was tired of not getting a good night’s sleep, for fear of mussing my hair.

    4. I was tired of running from the elements.

    5. I was tired of my hair not growing. Depending on the season or for no apparent reason, it would break, chip, flake, split, fall out…

    6. I was tired of going to a salon giving up Saturday’s to a beautician that was always late and had too much drama.

    7. I was tired of my hair turning that unnatural shade of brown.

    8. I was tired of broken hair on the bathroom sink after constant flat ironing.

    9. I was tired of all the broken promises and hopes in every bottle and jar.

    10. I was tired of suffering a burnt scalp every 6 – 8 weeks and still even after all that not measuring up. It was after all, permed hair. It wasn’t naturally straight. It was just there.

    11. etc, etc, etc, ad infinitm.

    Reply
  48. serenissima 18 September 2009 at 3:06 am Permalink

    I had long, thick, and relatively hair when I was relaxed- but it is nothing compared to now! I began to worry about my hair when I noticed that, even after washing or curling with a flat iron, my hair would NOT hold a curl. It would be flat and straight within ten minutes.

    My hair has always been thick and curly, so I didn't know what to do with it when this started happening. I didn't want to perm it anymore, so I decided to just let it be. Four months later, I'm currently transitioning and have two to three inches of new growth, and the texture and moisture level of my hair is SO much better!

    I had a lot of issues with dryness and tangling with my relaxed hair, as well as excessive shedding, and, since going natural, I have noticed much improvement in all three areas. I'm also taking the time to realize what types of products my hair likes and doesn't like, so detangling has become easier, too.

    Plus it's so easy and fun to do now. I had ZERO versatility with my old hair, it was always parted to the side and worn straight… I was bored every day. Now wash and go's, curly fros, and two strand twists are my absolute favorites, especially because my permed hair wouldn't hold a twist. I just love it.

    Reply
  49. serenissima 18 September 2009 at 4:07 am Permalink

    *and relatively healthy

    Sorry about that lol

    Reply

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