45 Responses to “Curly fros preferred over picked out fros?”

1. 

   Nalena 19 January 2010 at 1:51 am Permalink

   My hair is 4b and I prefer to display my kinky hair in a picked out fro. I don’t like the look of twist outs or other similar types of styles in my hair. Honestly, I know that some people may not like it but I love it and I find that my inner light shines forth so much brighter when I’m happy with myself that I don’t care if some people don’t like it.

   Btw, I’m also an attorney and I’ve worn my fro to work without any issues.

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2. 

   AMarie 19 January 2010 at 2:49 am Permalink

   hmmmm, I wondered that myself. I stopped picking out mine b/c I wanted to stop using combs/brushes on my hair. These days, I just do protective styles like braids/twists/flat twists, and alternate between that and a twist out/ braid out.

   I had 2+ years of wearing a picked out ‘fro, I think it’s time for me to explore other styles (finally)

   Note: my hair is a combination of 4B/3C (yes… very interesting) I absolutely love my kinks, curls and corkscrews!

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3. 

   Bee Michelle 19 January 2010 at 3:00 am Permalink

   I don’t like my hair in an afro. It isn’t because I’m ashamed of it, I just like curly hair. I became natural for ONE reason and that was to have a head full of nice fluffy, curly hair which I have now. I have picked out my hair before and I hated it. It appeared uneven and just didn’t look cute.

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4. 

   Alice 19 January 2010 at 4:16 am Permalink

   Hm..I’ve never thought about it that way. I know I tend to wear my hair in curly fros because when I wear my hair in a full (fabulous!) picked out fro, my hair tends to knot up badly.

   I know for a fact if my hair NEVER knotted up at the ends when I wore a full fro, I would be sporting it way more than I do.

   Alice
   http://diaryofakinkycurlytransitioner.wordpress.com/

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5. 

   Jc 19 January 2010 at 5:34 am Permalink

   I am a type 4 too and I am definitely all for a picked out afro. I am a scientist and I have also worn my afro with no problems. Scientists have a great tradition of wearing fro’s – check out Einstein!

   The only reason I don’t wear an afro any more is because there’s too much work involved now. As my hair became longer, it started to droop when picked. In order to shape it I will have to wet it and this will cause shrinkage, tangling and headaches.

   I think in truth we can create barriers for ourselves. Honestly there is really not much difference in the two pictures (meaning her curl pattern is distinctive in both pictures). I think wearing your hair in the way you feel most confident is the best way to wear it.

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6. 

   Alana 19 January 2010 at 7:10 am Permalink

   I’m almost at my 11 month mark of being natural and have only worn a non-curly afro once. I didn’t like it either. I don’t think it means you love yourself or your hair any less I just think it’s a matter of preference. Like some people like their hair better in braids than in twists.
   I don’t love my natural fro partly cus I don’t love shrinkage. To me it just means tangles at the end of the day and at this point I’m almost to where I have a good bit of hang time and i’m proud of every inch of it.
   So in my mind curly fro or not it’s just good enough that you’re rocking your natural hair and that you love it

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7. 

   LBell 19 January 2010 at 7:57 am Permalink

   Your picked-out ‘fro looks close to my curly ‘fro…on a GOOD day. (Good = I’m able to massage all the parts out so that it’s not too scalpy) I can’t imagine what your “community” would say about my (4b/4c) hair. And I’m saddened but not surprised that black folks (I’m assuming these are black people) get so nitpicky about hair texture such that YOUR hair (which isn’t in any way nappy) would be considered “too nappy.”

   Currently my picked-out ‘fro (actually it’s finger-combed because I don’t pick; I might brush it out) looks like I stuck my finger in a light socket. That’s what stretching does to my hair…it tends to straighten it out. Scrunching with something water-based tends to soften it but it also causes my ends to coil and snap off. I prefer the curly ‘fro because it usually rounds itself out into an actual ‘fro shape.

   As for what people think? Please. *smh* I’ve been natural for way too long to let other people’s hair insecurities affect me…

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8. 

   Wambui Wamutogoria 19 January 2010 at 8:25 am Permalink

   yes, it looks a little more finished

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9. 

   The Black Bot 19 January 2010 at 9:02 am Permalink

   This is absolutely correct. Naturals are supposed to be progressive, yet I hear so many coveting “defined curls.”

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10. 

    TheAmazon 19 January 2010 at 9:05 am Permalink

    Lol, girl no. Since you could never mistake my fro for a curly fro , I don’t think I ever really gave it too much thought.

    But seriously! at the end of the day if YOU like that picked out fro, rock it, the people who may not like it have nothing to do with you.

    I don’t know about the curly being more acceptable, but definitely more preferred, if you were to *gasp* wear your hair as it grows out of your head.

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11. 

    KeaCurls 19 January 2010 at 9:34 am Permalink

    When i first BC’d, I was hair-obsessed with learning how to define my curls. I can go from a curly wash n go, to big fro…in a few minutes just depending on how much conditioner I leave in my hair. Now that I’m learning how to better style and take care of my hair, i view my fro as just another style. I just know when I unleash it…to get ready for the “throwback to the 70s” comments!

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12. 

    Chantel 19 January 2010 at 9:40 am Permalink

    I love my big huge fro and I rock it proudly everytime I wear it. However when I do chose to wear a curly fro or a wash n go my family seems to accept it more so I guess it depends on society’s view of natural hair in general. I love big hair and whatever gets me to that is fine with me

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13. 

    OneBrownSnowPea 19 January 2010 at 9:53 am Permalink

    With me the issue isn’t texture its length. I actually love my tight coils, but I’m at the stage where my hair is too short for a WnG fro that I like. So I do twist-outs and most importantly my hair has less breakage when it is stretched.

    I do on occasion wear a huge blown out afro and I don’t care what anyone has to say about it because it is so fly.

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14. 

    The Notorious Z.A.G. 19 January 2010 at 10:51 am Permalink

    @The Black Bot: since when does non-permed hair = progression? This is news to me. I know plenty of nappy headed fools, so please…don’t get it twisted. It bothers me that people think this way. I simply don’t understand this logic!!

    Now, as far as curly vs. picked fro’s, I too think its a matter of preference. I sometimes wear mine picked out, it makes me feel so 70′s! I haven’t done it in a while though, but I don’t feel any kind of negative way toward it. I just adore big hair. Period. Love who you are, and badazz hair will soon follow, any way you decide to style it!

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15. 

    thelady 19 January 2010 at 11:02 am Permalink

    I’m a 4a and prefer a shrunken coil wash n go look over a picked out look. My hair looks dryer when picked out plus it is even to have a misshapen picked out fro. In the winter I just do twist outs.

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16. 

    Yoshi3329 19 January 2010 at 11:34 am Permalink

    I never noticed it. No seriously, maybe I’m a bit slow, but I honesty though it was just one of our hair’s many possibilities.

    Guess not.

    I really didn’t know that people actually felt this way, I’m sorry if anyone thinks that curly equals better or whatever.

    BTW, Ashli, your hair looks great either way! Mwah! Love it!

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17. 

    Nicole 19 January 2010 at 11:40 am Permalink

    I love them both, I don’t see anything negative or “unkempt” or less acceptable about a picked out fro.

    I love the volume of a picked out fro, and the definition of curly fro, just depends on what I feel like doing that day.

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18. 

    BrownEyes 19 January 2010 at 12:22 pm Permalink

    I think both styles look good on you. I rarely wear an afro because it is so eye catching, unless I have make up and clothes to rock it, it can make me feel a bit self conscious. Also my hair won’t hold a shape when its picked out -it flops – it just won’t go straight up into a round shape, and blows around and tends to look shapeless and loose its style by the time I get where I am going.

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19. 

    Tonya 19 January 2010 at 12:23 pm Permalink

    I love the curly fro and personally dislike the picked out fro. I think it has to do with looking more modern – the picked out fro looks dated to me.

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20. 

    Joy 19 January 2010 at 12:41 pm Permalink

    I’ve never been able to wear a picked out fro, but I have seen some great ones! It is rather dated, but when done properly and paired with sassy attire, the picked out fro can be fierce.
    But to be safer I absolutely love the curly fro; it is my ride-or-die!

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21. 

    J 19 January 2010 at 1:23 pm Permalink

    I do prefer a curly fro to a picked out fro mostly because it’s easier to take care of (ie-keep moisturized and reduce tangles & knots). I also think it gives a more modern twist to the traditional old school afros and it serves as a reminder that black girls have naturally curly hair too.

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22. 

    Bajan Princess 82 19 January 2010 at 1:36 pm Permalink

    My hair looks dry and lifeless when picked out. I’m a mix of 3c and 4a and the front and back don’t ‘fro’ (it flops), while the middle will stand straight up. I would look foolish trying to rock a picked out fro. I love my curls and prefer to wear my hair curly.

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23. 

    Savannah 19 January 2010 at 1:47 pm Permalink

    I’ve never worn a curly fro before. I’m a type 4 and usually I’ll just pick and pat while it’s in a twa phase. I’ll probably try a curly from when I have more length. I think that both looks are beautiful.

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24. 

    Ashli 19 January 2010 at 1:47 pm Permalink

    Thank you all for the feed back. I think that is what I need. If you guys are on youtube, I hope to see you all soon.

    Peace & Love

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25. 

    Khambria 19 January 2010 at 2:05 pm Permalink

    I’ve thought about this issue soo many times… People are so obsessed with defined curls (and there’s nothing wrong with that, I like definition sometimes) but are completely afraid to just rock a picked out fro. For me, the fact that I have 4b/4c hair makes me more comfortable with rocking the picked out look because a lot of the time it just looks like a stretch version of how my hair is normally.

    I WISH somebody would tell me my fro looks dated or unkempt, cuz I’d definitely have some words for them lol

    and Ashli, you look fabulous either way! do what makes you happy :)

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26. 

    FurryCoconut 19 January 2010 at 2:19 pm Permalink

    I think the problem here is texture. People who are in the deeper end of the type 4 (4b-4?) seem to believe they wouldn’t look authentic with the “curly fro”. People who a curly with bits of kinks seems to believe they would look unkempt because their hair would look wiry and shapeless.

    I have “Nigerian” hair and i wouldn’t look right with a curly fro.

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27. 

    Ms. Bar B 19 January 2010 at 2:27 pm Permalink

    Awww, but I like your picked out ‘fro! I hope that you will feel comfortable to wear it out in the future with pride, because it absolutely beautiful!

    I do think that the picked out ‘fro gets a bad wrap because people don’t see it as contemporary enough. When you see styles in magazines, its always the curly, modern take on the Afro that is shown. I think that both are equally beautiful, and that rocking a picked out ‘fro is just another step in conquering the fear that comes with making the decision to go natural =)

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28. 

    Jade 19 January 2010 at 2:31 pm Permalink

    So is this basically another way of saying “the perfectly spherical afro” vs “the chunky afro?”

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29. 

    Tiffany 19 January 2010 at 2:34 pm Permalink

    I prefer to wear my hair curly as opposed to blown out. I think it’s just a prefernce & everyone will have their own. I hate to hear people say that it defeats the purpose to never wear your hair in a fro. It’s almost as if they’re saying that you’re not being black enough. Just like with clothes, shoes & other accessories, you wear your hair the way that you like it & how you feels suites you/your lifestyle. I think we should focus on what makes us a like & not one more way to divide us!

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30. 

    Softfocushalo 19 January 2010 at 3:44 pm Permalink

    I love my picked out fro. When I had a TWA i liked it curly because it was so short. Now that I have some hang time I like to pick my fro out because it gets BIG and I like the atten..er uh appreciation I get from it*kanyeshrugs* I think both of your fro’s are fly, I love your color too.

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31. 

    Maria 19 January 2010 at 5:12 pm Permalink

    I prefer my hair big and kinky! After washing I do two strand twists with shea butter and coconut oil to moisturise and detangle, and I always hate my hair for the first three or so days after I take them out because it sits so flat on my head, but once it begins to spread out again and get fluffy, I love it!

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32. 

    Christina 19 January 2010 at 9:37 pm Permalink

    It is ALLLLL about the big, kinky/nappy fro! Curly fros are okay if you want the look, too. Personally, you are still natural, and the TYPE of curl you have doesn’t define how natural you are!
    I’d do wash n gos every day (the bigger, the better) if it weren’t for the insane amount of single strand knots at the end of the day:-)

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33. 

    Tanaka 19 January 2010 at 10:20 pm Permalink

    I used to love my kinky afro wen my hair was shorter now it’s inbetween long and short about 10 inches and it personally looks funny to me picked out i cant get it as round as i want and some parts end up flatter than other.My hair tangles very easy (root to ends)curly fros mean less tangles to deal with later for me but I will use myself as a case study when I take my twists off and rock my kinky afro to see mine and peoples perceptions.

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34. 

    Fatty B. 19 January 2010 at 11:34 pm Permalink

    i prefer a curly and it aint got nothin to do with what nobody thinks :) unless im twisting my hair into a style, i like to just let it do what it do. for Annie (my fro), moisture= coils n curls. also, i don’t own a pick & the thought of trying to comb thru a trillion tiny coils is scary!

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35. 

    Natz 20 January 2010 at 12:28 am Permalink

    i remem reading somewhere on bglh abt one chick with ‘curlier’ (ie, more loosely coiled) hair saying she envied girls with ‘nappier’ (don’t really like that word) hair. well…that was kind of me. i WOULD wear that MASSIVE, PICKED OUT TO THE MOON fro…if i could. problem is my hair would laugh at me. and flop. pitifully. i don’t have ‘hair envy’ anymore, but just saying…if you can work it…then WORK it!! but in the end, do you.

    but more to the point of the original post…i DO think that ‘curlier’ softer looking afros are SEEN as more ‘acceptable’…but i also blv that has a whole lot to do with the messages we get from others and the media. i live in barbados where the MAJORITY of the population is black, and DOES NOT look like the stick thin model with the curly/wavy/bone straight hair posed next to the car/hair product/bottle of detergent being sold…yet a good proportion of the advertising here (and i guess in other places) uses those images…and i’ll be honest – it bugs me. not that i have anything at all against diversity. it’s just that when advertising, or the media in general says ‘diversity’, what they really mean is ‘diversity within a narrow, semi-eurocentric’ point of view. and the thing that KILLS me is that so often we buy into the image of a the lighter skinned chick with the loosely coiled hair and REJECT images of darker-skinned beauties with proud, natural kinks. and all it amounts to is racism – repackaged.

    sorry for the semi-rant, hope you get the point. but yh, girl…rock that fro!

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36. 

    Ruth 20 January 2010 at 12:35 am Permalink

    You know, that’s a real tough question. I’d have to say sometimes i do. It’s sad i know now that i have my TWA i’m very self-concious. I love being natural, especially the amazing growth i’m getting but at the same time i don’t have the balls i guess to go all the way. Yeah there’s been a bunch of times the last month or two when i just don’t rock out the fro and just put a hood on or leave it with the curly.

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37. 

    Coffey 20 January 2010 at 10:08 am Permalink

    Interesting perspective that I’ve never given much thought to. I’ve worn my hair in its actual state for so long, I just go with the flow. I tend to not agonize over my hair’s texture, whether people will have a fit if I pick it out into a large ‘fro, or the hair system/chart we love to defer to.

    I know some issues within our “natural hair community”– such as “texture acceptance”– has been plaguing me, so I logged a blog entry about it.

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38. 

    Ambrosia 20 January 2010 at 10:29 am Permalink

    New to BGLH. BC in June 2009. I am a 4 hair type and love both styles. For me, I was always told all my life my hair was nappy. I knew I could rock an afro anyday but I had no idea my hair would curl and coil until I cut off the relaxer. Its abouting loving the skin and hair you’re in… as a TWA or head full of curls…

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39. 

    merlanda 20 January 2010 at 10:49 am Permalink

    I have never experienced a “curly” fro by definition, my hair is extremely kinky and coarse. I now live in the south so unfortunately my experiences have not been kind. My fro has increased my self-love and sense of who I am because of all of the “nice-nasty” comments I have received from people who look just like me. I rock it,cause I can.

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40. 

    Aisha 20 January 2010 at 11:25 am Permalink

    In my opinion, a fro is a fro,, whether curly or picked out. I don’t think either one is seen as more acceptable to the world at large. I like the look of both a picked out and a curly fro, but I wear a curly fro because it is less work for me-it’s simpler to just wash and let it be. When I pick out my hair it feels like too much manipulation. Also, I only comb my hair once a week.

    I will say this-I don’t care for the in between look where some parts are frizzed out and others are curly. I prefer it either or.

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41. 

    Nikki 20 January 2010 at 4:54 pm Permalink

    I rocked the pick out look a couple of times when i had a TWA and I really didn’t like it on me. First off my hair is a reddish brown color that I hate, it’s way too thick and it would just hurt to pick it out, then it never looked even, then it wouldn’t look like those fabulous fros I grew up seeing, it would just look kind of square shaped or it would straighten out too much. Plus there would be lots of tangles and knots afterward.

    Now that it’s longer I wouldn’t even dare. My hair continues to be kinda stiff looking, not fluffy and round, and I don’t have time to be detangling and picking my hair like that. I do wish I could rock a cool fro though.

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42. 

    Sherri 21 January 2010 at 5:58 pm Permalink

    I rock my picked out ‘fro and keep it movin’! I have come to realize that when I wore a “curlier” more textured look aka wash and go, I would end up with fairy knots galore!!! By keeping my hair conditioned, moisturized and plaited (stretched), it tangles a lot less.

    I admit, I was a bit saddened by some of the comments on this subject. They reminded me of Chris Rock’s “Good Hair” movie trailer when someone was trying to sell afro textured hair, to no avail. It’s amazing to me that in 2010 not much has changed. Sisters need to learn to love and encourage each other.

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43. 

    Aisha 21 January 2010 at 9:55 pm Permalink

    I feel like there is an underlying assumption (no one said it outright) that 1) a “picked out fro” is the natural state of our hair, and 2) that we haven’t fully accepted ourselves as naturals if we don’t like to wear our hair this way.

    But what if curly is the natural state of your hair? What is picked out hair actually requires MORE work/manipulation to achieve? I think asking if a person appreciates their hair in a product free, unmanipulated style is a better indicator of their acceptance of their hair. And even then, there is nothing wrong with preferring a styled look, as long as you don’t feel your very existence depends on it.

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44. 

    Shannon 22 January 2010 at 9:35 pm Permalink

    Thanks for pointing that out Aisha. The natural state of my hair is kinky coils that stand up = curly fro. Picked out looks extremely dated; I prefer funky, chunky, and curly. Not to mention it’s painful and damaging (I had little broken hairs all over my shirt just like when I had a perm).

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45. 

    Jo Somebody 18 May 2011 at 11:30 am Permalink

    Hmm, I like all of them. The only one I probably would be reluctant to do is the picked-out fro because I’d be worried about damaging my strands. The ‘normal’ packed fro may be second best because I’m sure it would tangle up in an instant on my head. The curly fro will probably be most popular for me as it would be the result of a twist-out, which in my mind = two styles from one. Ideal!

    Reply

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