I was total­ly shocked by this sto­ry on strawberricurls.com about a read­ers’ expe­ri­ence get­ting a wash, blow-dry and flat iron at a salon. Here’s an excerpt;

Once washed, the sham­poo girl and my styl­ist for the day went away from me and start­ed whis­per­ing. I sup­pose I should’ve wor­ried but I’m not the para­noid type. After the whis­per ses­sion, the styl­ist came over and asked what I want­ed done… just a wash and blow dry is what I told her. This should involve them wash­ing my hair, con­di­tion­ing it, blow dry­ing it and then flat iron­ing it. I had it done hun­dred of times before with­out an issue. She said okay and offered to do a deep con­di­tion treat­ment for me as it would help pro­tect my hair.. her words.

I agreed as long as it didn’t take too long and she promised it wouldn’t. To the back of the salon she goes to mix up a deep con­di­tion treat­ment. I didn’t find this abnor­mal. I often mix things togeth­er to use as a DT myself. She start­ed to apply to my hair and it smelled weird, I asked her about it and she said it’s one of the ingre­di­ents for Ph bal­ance.

Ummm.. okay.

About ten min­utes in it start­ed to burn which I found weird but she assured me it was just “tin­gling” and it was good for my scalp… anoth­er 3 min­utes and I told her to rin­se me because I was hav­ing some sort of aller­gic reac­tion or some­thing (I have pret­ty sen­si­tive skin so this was pos­si­ble). She rinsed me out and moved me to the chair. My hair was notice­ably straighter as my hair wet with­out pro­duct is very curly and big and poofy, lol. This time my curls hung straight-ish which wasn’t nor­mal. She assured me that it was tem­po­rary from the heavy con­di­tion­er.

“Okay…” I said

She did my hair as nor­mal and 2 days lat­er the break­age start­ed. Pan­icked, I went to wash my hair and again the curls just weren’t there… I had major heat dam­age. After sev­er­al deep treat­ments, co-wash­es, etc. my hair nev­er returned to its nor­mal state and con­tin­ued to break off. I returned to Michi­gan (where I was stay­ing) and had my hair braid­ed, hop­ing that would help.

When I final­ly moved to Illi­nois (about 3 weeks lat­er) I was ready to take my braids out, upon doing so my hair was just com­ing out in huge chunks even though I was being gen­tle. I went back to the salon and pitched a fit demand­ing to talk to some­one in charge. (Yeah, it may seem a bit crazy for hair.. but we know how impor­tant hair is to us, right?) When I final­ly spoke to the man­ager, she also feigned igno­rance. I threat­ened police action, threat­ened to sue and even­tu­al­ly some­one gave up the infor­ma­tion I need­ed.

She told me that with “nap­py” hair, they some­times add a bit of relax­er to a deep con­di­tion­er and apply it. It’s the “kid­die perm” she tells me and most peo­ple don’t expe­ri­ence neg­a­tive results. She said it works well because peo­ple are hap­py that their hair is straighter so they con­tin­ue to come back.

Click here for the rest of the sto­ry. This is so ridicu­lous!! What are your thoughts ladies? Has this ever hap­pened to you?!

Black Girl With Long Hair

Leila Noel­lis­te, founder of Black Girl with Long Hair (April 2008). Social media, pop cul­ture and black beau­ty enthu­si­ast. bell hooks’ hair twin…

Leave a Reply

216 Comments on "Stylists Adding Relaxers to Conditioners on Natural Hair Clients??"

Notify of

**JAW DROPS** Omg.…I’m so upset read­ing this post.
SUE THEM! That will teach them a lesson.
This is just appalling. How can a styl­ist put a pro­duct in anoth­er person’s hair (that some­what per­ma­nent­ly alters it) with­out let­ting them know. Its THEIR hair!!
SMH.…This just makes me even more para­noid about salons.


That is why I do my own hair, the police would’ve had to been called if that was me… Some­body would have been hurt.

Leo the Yardie Chick



This has almost ruined my day…what is WRONG WITH PEOPLE?!
Please tell me you are going to sue the­se people…someone needs to teach them a lesson.…


We take too much of this stuff sit­ting down. I would’ve gone apes*** on them — in a court of bloody law. All them heifers would be f’red — bet they’d nev­er try that mess again. OOoooohh­hh I can’t TAKE ignance!

African Violet
I’m speech­less. I’ve always been appre­hen­sive about salons, even back when I was relaxed. It hap­pened twice at two dif­fer­ent loca­tions in two dif­fer­ent states where I told the styl­ist that I didn’t like gel in my hair because no mat­ter what gel they used, the gel would hard­en, mak­ing it dif­fi­cult for me to do any­thing but wash my hair all over again. And on those two occa­sions, I was told, “Oh, I’m only going to use a lit­tle.” Instead, each used a lot, and my hair got what? Hard.  I under­stand that they went to school (most of the… Read more »

What is it about hair­dressers NOT DOING WHAT YOU TELL THEM TO! Jesus Lord, I’ve had this expe­ri­ence on DIFFERENT CONTINENTS for God sake! I treat styl­ists like doc­tors, per­son­al train­ers and oth­er ‘prac­ti­tion­ers’- they may I advise but MY body knows best, I KNOW best. I’m hav­ing a mini melt­down just think­ing about this.



“they may I advise but MY body knows best, I KNOW best”

African Violet

They don’t lis­ten to us because they think they know bet­ter for our own hair. It’s like you said–we know our bod­ies best, but we let some­one tell us oth­er­wise because they have let­ters behind their names or a cer­tifi­cate on the wall.


I have read sim­i­lar sto­ries on oth­er nat­u­ral hair boards. Has any­one this has hap­pened to got­ten any more than an a BS expla­na­tion? I don’t see how any­one can be so polite about hav­ing an unso­licit­ed per­ma­nent process done to them and not demand some­thing to be done. This is unex­cus­able. We all know how much time and work main­tain­ing nat­u­ral hair can be. To have a “styl­ist” ruin that work with­out per­mis­sion is unthink­able.


There is no way I would not be tak­ing some kind of legal action!

Robin Nicolew
Wow… We grown, but that is real­ly ’cause for an ass whop­pin’. Real­ly. I would like to hear a legal professional’s opin­ion on this mat­ter. There has to be some type of legal action that can be tak­en for this fool­ish­ness! I am TERRIFIED of going to ANY salon. I have not allowed any salon pro­fes­sion­al to do any­thing to my hair oth­er than buzz it/cut it. I real­ly want­ed to go to the salon and have my hair washed/deep conditioned/cut, but this post has aid­ed me in my deci­sion of going to a strict (most like­ly) male bar­ber who… Read more »

I have nev­er ever heard of any­thing like this before. I am floored!!! I haven’t been to a salon in ages and hear­ing some­thing like this makes me GLAD!!! I don’t know what I would have done if I was her. SMH…

I think I would have known that some­thing was up when I got a wiff of “Deep con­di­tion­er”. The smell of a relax­er is one that is not eas­i­ly for­got­ten.

I feel bad for her though.


WHAT?!?!?!?! I would have torn that salon up, my beau­ti­cian knows that I’m nat­u­ral and she would NEVER put relax­er in my con­di­tion­er. She needs to take action ASAP, that was rude and uneth­i­cal as a beau­ti­cian! Your job is to sat­is­fy the cus­tomer and not make deci­sions with­out the cus­tomer con­sent. She doesn’t make the deci­sion of how straight or curly you want your hair. I’m utter­ly shock. smdh

Ballerina Girl

Omg!! Seri­ous­ly my mouth is like wide open.
I’m sure it’s total­ly ille­gal to do that? Words can not describe what I would do to that salon.
I would be incan­des­cent :-(((
Action needs to be tak­en, quick time! Just the assump­tion that you would want your hair straighter makes me so mad..


:O :O :O
oh hell no! this lady han­dled that with a lot of grace. I would have prob­a­bly got­ten vio­lent. I feel angry on her behalf. This sto­ry increas­es my dis­trust of salons and styl­ists and rein­forces my love of the diy nat­u­ral cul­ture.

im hon­est­ly not surprised.…i remem­ber an inci­dent at a domini­can salon in queens ny where i was offered the same thing…i have big but fine curly hair so it looks wayyyy more intim­i­dat­ing that it actu­al­ly is…the styl­ist told me i should get a tex­tur­iz­er to make my hair “easier”…i said “what? no.” she con­tin­ues to push the issue say­ing “its just a lit­tle relax­er in a lot of con­di­tion­er, it will make your hair more better”.…now im like “excuse me??!! i said no” the­se so called beau­ti­cians have a lot of audac­i­ty and i feel they are lazy. id… Read more »

atleast that styl­ist NOTIFIED you of what she want­ed to do. this lady was tricked and untold. smh.


This is why I was like I do not get why this keeps hap­pen­ing they are sup­posed to be trained styl­ists. It is unfor­tu­nate that this hap­pened.


This is shock­ing and unethical.……i would have tak­en this Salon to court.But there is deep prob­lem underneath:the respect of our ourselves.What is it that there will always be some­one to think that he knows bet­ter than your­self whaqt you should do .…And this old idea that our hair is bet­ter when relaxed..this sto­ry makes me mad


the fact that the­se styl­ists put a relax­er on top of wet, fresh­ly washed hair & scalp is blow­ing me! what if she was nat­u­ral b/c she is aller­gic to the chem­i­cals in relax­ers, what if her throat closed up in the chair?! i think some styl­ists need to be remind­ed that the idea of beau­ty varies, & stu­pid mis­takes like this can cost you your ass!


That was my first thought also. Why in the world would any­one put relax­er on wet hair? I think if this was a chain I would report to the region­al or nation­al man­age­ment. I think I would also con­tact the cos­mol­o­gy board. 

And because I would want any­one else to expe­ri­ence the shock, I would post the name of the salon, the styl­ist and the man­ager on this site, naturalcurlly.com, napputuality.com, twit­ter and face­book. When some­one googles or bings that shop they will know exact­ly what they are get­ting.


so true!



I am sor­ry but I do not get it why this keeps repeat­ing itself e.g. “she gave me a cut instead of trim” now you get a “kid­die relax­er” instead of a DC. That would nev­er hap­pen to me. I always take my own prod­ucts even when I was relaxed and I spoke up. If I was not hap­py you were not get­ting paid. I would be watch­ing their every move and side to the side so I can see in the mir­ror. Plus I would smell the prod­ucts just to get a feel for it in case some­thing was… Read more »

Wow. Do you want a cook­ie?
Blam­ing the vic­tim and being all “I would nev­er” isn’t help­ing any­one. Have a seat.


No but you clear­ly do! For you weak state­ment. How is that blam­ing the vic­tim??? You go and sit down some­where.

What you have pro­posed is a good solu­tion and one that I am going to fol­low should I ever find myself in the posi­tion of going to a hair salon again (which is high­ly doubt­ful). HOWEVER. I don’t think that this wom­an should have been blamed for not bring­ing her own prod­ucts to the hair salon. We don’t blame peo­ple who get sal­mo­nel­la or oth­er forms of food poi­son­ing because they “should have known to bring their own food to a restau­rant” or for peo­ple who suf­fer from poor care at the hands of oth­er pro­fes­sion­als whether they are doc­tors… Read more »

Mina that was fun­ny, “bring your own food to a restau­rant”. but good anal­o­gy, this def­i­nite­ly wasn’t that woman’s fault. a shame that one would have to be on their guard in a place that is charged to do hair.

so true, I’m ashamed of the­se styl­ist. (as a nat­u­ral hair pro) They shouldn’t touch their hair if they don’t want to deal with it or under­stand it. I would have been off the chain in that salon the sec­ond my scalp start­ed BURNING. They could have done some very seri­ous dam­age to her scalp. Espe­cial­ly if they were apply­ing it like a con­di­tion­er instead of a relax­er. (usu­al­ly mas­sage con­di­tion­er it my clients hair) and then if they wer­ent wash­ing the active chem­i­cals out prop­er­ly. Which I’m sure they weren’t since they were try­ing try­ing to fool her into… Read more »
I NEVER blamed (this word is being used too much in the­se com­ments) her. This is how wild­fire spreads when peo­ple dont read things properly.I was quite upset hear­ing this again not real­is­ing until some­one point­ed it out this sto­ry was out in 07 I had heard of the sto­ry some time ago though and thought not again smh. The client should nev­er be blamed,obviously. Hav­ing said that not all styl­ists are bad but like I said some­one may not be on point that day. There has to be some­thing in place for cus­tomers and a pro­ce­dure we can take.If any­one… Read more »
Where did I blame the lady if I was doing that I would have addressed her direct­ly. I said I do not get why this hap­pens not blam­ing her but why are the styl­ists still doing this?? I was stat­ing what I have done before and would do con­cern­ing my hair. I can only speak for my hair. So next time please read prop­er­ly. If Jaz could get it oth­ers should too. What would I gain by blam­ing any­one? Will it make my hair grow?? So your state­ment is redun­dant as per the “should have known to bring…” smh I… Read more »

I don’t believe that she was blam­ing the lady for not tak­ing in her own prod­ucts, but she was shar­ing her expe­ri­ences and what she would do at the salon.

Sor­ry, but she does seem to be doing that in the first part of her respon­se, you should read it again: ” I am sor­ry but I do not get it why this keeps repeat­ing itself e.g. “she gave me a cut instead of trim” now you get a “kid­die relax­er” instead of a DC. That would nev­er hap­pen to me. I always take my own prod­ucts…” That is great that she had the fore­sight to do that, but I will reit­er­ate what I wrote ear­lier: if you are pay­ing for a ser­vice you should not have to go to… Read more »

Sor­ry but you mis­in­ter­pret­ed what I meant. I was refer­ring to the­se bad prac­tices occur­ring again and again and espe­cial­ly in a place where you are meant to have a pro­fes­sion­al ser­vice. Sure you should not have to go to such mea­sures but bet­ter safe than sor­ry.


Thank you at least you got my statement.I am glad there are peo­ple like you. Clap clap. 

She must have missed the “How­ev­er, that is just me” part smh.


I hope it hasn’t come to that (need­ing to bring your own prod­ucts). This is sup­posed to be a pro­fes­sion­al ser­vice.


This is not the first time peo­ple would bring their own prod­ucts it is not a new prac­tice. Peo­ple even get charged cheap­er for bring­ing their own products.I know what prod­ucts work on my hair I would rather use that than some­thing that may not work well on my hair. 

I would hope it does not but for me bet­ter safe than sor­ry. “sup­posed to be” that is it right there but unfor­tu­nate­ly this as we know is not always the case.


WOW. i know not all salons are like the one in this arti­cle but it makes me very appre­hen­sive about going in to get my hair done.


+ 1




Uhh, can we say seri­ous ass whoop­ing?




This is very uneth­i­cal. Can’t some­thing be done about this?

hon­est­ly I would have wrung their necks, kicked them in the butt repeat­ed­ly then shaved their heads. I would have gone incred­i­ble hulk on them and I am not even kid­ding. Just because it’s hair doesn’t mean all the months of hard work in main­tain­ing its beau­ty should be thrown down the drain because of some rub­bish of a salon. If I want­ed a perm I’d ask for it. Damn them and I am not even kid­ding. For real, I’d sue them, for emo­tion­al griev­ance and fal­si­fy­ing infor­ma­tion. In no way did the wom­an ask for a relax­er, so she… Read more »

I burst out laugh­ing at this because its so true.


yes, this is grounds for a major beat­down and a law­suit. she has to cut off all her hair and start again. Nope, i would­ve wiped the floor w some­ones face. this is why i stopped going to salons. they real­ly dont know how to do nat­u­ral hair. and the nat­u­ral salons are too damn expen­sive. $80 for some two strand twists? thats bs.

Bella Duafe

I think you have start­ed some­thing! I live in Atlanta and there are tons of nat­u­ral hair care salons, all of them charg­ing any­where from 60 to 80 for two strand twist or some vari­a­tion of that. There is even a salon here that requires a deposit at the time of your appoint­ment! I want to have the expe­ri­ence of being in someone’s chair tak­ing care of my hair, but it’s becom­ing too expen­sive and it doesn’t last. I can get may­be a week, week and a half from most places! I’m on #teamover­it!!!


Not as bad as $90 for only a trim!!!!


Wow, how do they jus­ti­fy $90 for a trim???


or $100 to start locs PLUS $90 every 4–6 weeks to main­tain them. you cant win for los­ing :-/



I am thank­ful to have a nat­u­ral hair salon near my house that I can trust and is cheap. I’m flab­ber­gast­ed at the prices. For a trim it’s like 5 to 10 bucks. For twists it’s 35 dol­lars on tues­day. How awe­some is that?

Just as I am

Very, since the only salon I know of that caters to nat­u­ral hair charges extra for wash­ing, blow dry­ing and trim­ming if your hair is nat­u­ral.
And I still end­ed up with split ends.

You’re very lucky.


@ Chim­my, whats the name of the salon? I go to one that’s a lit­tle far from me but worth it. The first time I sat in the chair I felt right at home with my styl­ist. They’re about aver­age priced for my area esp. since their in a prime time spot.


I live in Indi­anapolis, In and the salon is called Nat­u­ral­ly U, It’s a pret­ty nice salon. The lady that did my big chop was as talk­a­tive as I was, but then the lady who did my twist when I had gone a sec­ond time to the salon was soo qui­et, I get ner­vous around qui­et peo­ple lol.


this this THIS!!!!! you have a law­suit for real, they did some­thing irre­versible to your hair that you did NOT ask for under false pre­tens­es. omg, i can’t explain how incred­i­bly angry i’d be


YOU MUST SUE THEM. They need to be pun­ished for thier reck­less behav­ior, and you can help pro­tect oth­er nat­u­rals who may unwit­ting­ly vis­it that salon. OMG!


Wow! I am not shocked one bit. Sad!! I guess it can hap­pen any­where but I only go to salons that cater to nat­u­ral hair. It is an atmos­phere where nat­u­ral hair is encourged and cel­e­brat­ed! “Reg­u­lar” salons hate to see me walk­ing through the door with my huge nap­py Afro! :)


Since I BC’d, this has been one of my biggest fears, which is why I’m skep­ti­cal of going to salons, even the nat­u­ral ones. The life lesson here is that no one is going to treat your hair as well as you would. Sit­u­a­tions like the­se could be eas­i­ly avoid­ed if more wom­en real­ized this.


WTF??? I’m blown for her…I would’ve went OFF…how dare they! The igno­rance of some folk still gets me. SHM!!!!