I was total­ly shocked by this sto­ry on strawberricurls.com about a read­ers’ expe­ri­ence get­ting a wash, blow-dry and flat iron at a salon. Here’s an excerpt;

Once washed, the sham­poo girl and my styl­ist for the day went away from me and start­ed whis­per­ing. I sup­pose I should’ve wor­ried but I’m not the para­noid type. After the whis­per ses­sion, the styl­ist came over and asked what I want­ed done… just a wash and blow dry is what I told her. This should involve them wash­ing my hair, con­di­tion­ing it, blow dry­ing it and then flat iron­ing it. I had it done hun­dred of times before with­out an issue. She said okay and offered to do a deep con­di­tion treat­ment for me as it would help pro­tect my hair.. her words.

I agreed as long as it didn’t take too long and she promised it wouldn’t. To the back of the salon she goes to mix up a deep con­di­tion treat­ment. I didn’t find this abnor­mal. I often mix things togeth­er to use as a DT myself. She start­ed to apply to my hair and it smelled weird, I asked her about it and she said it’s one of the ingre­di­ents for Ph bal­ance.

Ummm.. okay.

About ten min­utes in it start­ed to burn which I found weird but she assured me it was just “tin­gling” and it was good for my scalp… anoth­er 3 min­utes and I told her to rinse me because I was hav­ing some sort of aller­gic reac­tion or some­thing (I have pret­ty sen­si­tive skin so this was pos­si­ble). She rinsed me out and moved me to the chair. My hair was notice­ably straighter as my hair wet with­out prod­uct is very curly and big and poofy, lol. This time my curls hung straight-ish which wasn’t nor­mal. She assured me that it was tem­po­rary from the heavy con­di­tion­er.

“Okay…” I said

She did my hair as nor­mal and 2 days lat­er the break­age start­ed. Pan­icked, I went to wash my hair and again the curls just weren’t there… I had major heat dam­age. After sev­er­al deep treat­ments, co-wash­es, etc. my hair nev­er returned to its nor­mal state and con­tin­ued to break off. I returned to Michi­gan (where I was stay­ing) and had my hair braid­ed, hop­ing that would help.

When I final­ly moved to Illi­nois (about 3 weeks lat­er) I was ready to take my braids out, upon doing so my hair was just com­ing out in huge chunks even though I was being gen­tle. I went back to the salon and pitched a fit demand­ing to talk to some­one in charge. (Yeah, it may seem a bit crazy for hair.. but we know how impor­tant hair is to us, right?) When I final­ly spoke to the man­ag­er, she also feigned igno­rance. I threat­ened police action, threat­ened to sue and even­tu­al­ly some­one gave up the infor­ma­tion I need­ed.

She told me that with “nap­py” hair, they some­times add a bit of relax­er to a deep con­di­tion­er and apply it. It’s the “kid­die perm” she tells me and most peo­ple don’t expe­ri­ence neg­a­tive results. She said it works well because peo­ple are hap­py that their hair is straighter so they con­tin­ue to come back.

Click here for the rest of the sto­ry. This is so ridicu­lous!! What are your thoughts ladies? Has this ever hap­pened to you?!

Black Girl With Long Hair

Leila Noel­liste, founder of Black Girl with Long Hair (April 2008). Social media, pop cul­ture and black beau­ty enthu­si­ast. bell hooks’ hair twin…

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216 Comments on "Stylists Adding Relaxers to Conditioners on Natural Hair Clients??"

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**JAW DROPS** Omg.…I’m so upset read­ing this post.
SUE THEM! That will teach them a les­son.
This is just appalling. How can a styl­ist put a prod­uct in anoth­er person’s hair (that some­what per­ma­nent­ly alters it) with­out let­ting them know. Its THEIR hair!!
SMH.…This just makes me even more para­noid about salons.


That is why I do my own hair, the police would’ve had to been called if that was me… Some­body would have been hurt.

Leo the Yardie Chick



This has almost ruined my day…what is WRONG WITH PEOPLE?!
Please tell me you are going to sue these people…someone needs to teach them a les­son.…


We take too much of this stuff sit­ting down. I would’ve gone apes*** on them — in a court of bloody law. All them heifers would be f’red — bet they’d nev­er try that mess again. OOoooohh­hh I can’t TAKE ignance!

African Violet
I’m speech­less. I’ve always been appre­hen­sive about salons, even back when I was relaxed. It hap­pened twice at two dif­fer­ent loca­tions in two dif­fer­ent states where I told the styl­ist that I didn’t like gel in my hair because no mat­ter what gel they used, the gel would hard­en, mak­ing it dif­fi­cult for me to do any­thing but wash my hair all over again. And on those two occa­sions, I was told, “Oh, I’m only going to use a lit­tle.” Instead, each used a lot, and my hair got what? Hard.  I under­stand that they went to school (most of the… Read more »

What is it about hair­dressers NOT DOING WHAT YOU TELL THEM TO! Jesus Lord, I’ve had this expe­ri­ence on DIFFERENT CONTINENTS for God sake! I treat styl­ists like doc­tors, per­son­al train­ers and oth­er ‘prac­ti­tion­ers’- they may I advise but MY body knows best, I KNOW best. I’m hav­ing a mini melt­down just think­ing about this.



“they may I advise but MY body knows best, I KNOW best”

African Violet

They don’t lis­ten to us because they think they know bet­ter for our own hair. It’s like you said–we know our bod­ies best, but we let some­one tell us oth­er­wise because they have let­ters behind their names or a cer­tifi­cate on the wall.


I have read sim­i­lar sto­ries on oth­er nat­ur­al hair boards. Has any­one this has hap­pened to got­ten any more than an a BS expla­na­tion? I don’t see how any­one can be so polite about hav­ing an unso­licit­ed per­ma­nent process done to them and not demand some­thing to be done. This is unex­cus­able. We all know how much time and work main­tain­ing nat­ur­al hair can be. To have a “styl­ist” ruin that work with­out per­mis­sion is unthink­able.


There is no way I would not be tak­ing some kind of legal action!

Robin Nicolew
Wow… We grown, but that is real­ly ’cause for an ass whop­pin’. Real­ly. I would like to hear a legal professional’s opin­ion on this mat­ter. There has to be some type of legal action that can be tak­en for this fool­ish­ness! I am TERRIFIED of going to ANY salon. I have not allowed any salon pro­fes­sion­al to do any­thing to my hair oth­er than buzz it/cut it. I real­ly want­ed to go to the salon and have my hair washed/deep conditioned/cut, but this post has aid­ed me in my deci­sion of going to a strict (most like­ly) male bar­ber who… Read more »

I have nev­er ever heard of any­thing like this before. I am floored!!! I haven’t been to a salon in ages and hear­ing some­thing like this makes me GLAD!!! I don’t know what I would have done if I was her. SMH…

I think I would have known that some­thing was up when I got a wiff of “Deep con­di­tion­er”. The smell of a relax­er is one that is not eas­i­ly for­got­ten.

I feel bad for her though.


WHAT?!?!?!?! I would have torn that salon up, my beau­ti­cian knows that I’m nat­ur­al and she would NEVER put relax­er in my con­di­tion­er. She needs to take action ASAP, that was rude and uneth­i­cal as a beau­ti­cian! Your job is to sat­is­fy the cus­tomer and not make deci­sions with­out the cus­tomer con­sent. She doesn’t make the deci­sion of how straight or curly you want your hair. I’m utter­ly shock. smdh

Ballerina Girl

Omg!! Seri­ous­ly my mouth is like wide open.
I’m sure it’s total­ly ille­gal to do that? Words can not describe what I would do to that salon.
I would be incan­des­cent :-(((
Action needs to be tak­en, quick time! Just the assump­tion that you would want your hair straighter makes me so mad..


:O :O :O
oh hell no! this lady han­dled that with a lot of grace. I would have prob­a­bly got­ten vio­lent. I feel angry on her behalf. This sto­ry increas­es my dis­trust of salons and styl­ists and rein­forces my love of the diy nat­ur­al cul­ture.

im hon­est­ly not surprised.…i remem­ber an inci­dent at a domini­can salon in queens ny where i was offered the same thing…i have big but fine curly hair so it looks wayyyy more intim­i­dat­ing that it actu­al­ly is…the styl­ist told me i should get a tex­tur­iz­er to make my hair “easier”…i said “what? no.” she con­tin­ues to push the issue say­ing “its just a lit­tle relax­er in a lot of con­di­tion­er, it will make your hair more better”.…now im like “excuse me??!! i said no” these so called beau­ti­cians have a lot of audac­i­ty and i feel they are lazy. id… Read more »

atleast that styl­ist NOTIFIED you of what she want­ed to do. this lady was tricked and untold. smh.


This is why I was like I do not get why this keeps hap­pen­ing they are sup­posed to be trained styl­ists. It is unfor­tu­nate that this hap­pened.


This is shock­ing and unethical.……i would have tak­en this Salon to court.But there is deep prob­lem underneath:the respect of our ourselves.What is it that there will always be some­one to think that he knows bet­ter than your­self whaqt you should do .…And this old idea that our hair is bet­ter when relaxed..this sto­ry makes me mad


the fact that these styl­ists put a relax­er on top of wet, fresh­ly washed hair & scalp is blow­ing me! what if she was nat­ur­al b/c she is aller­gic to the chem­i­cals in relax­ers, what if her throat closed up in the chair?! i think some styl­ists need to be remind­ed that the idea of beau­ty varies, & stu­pid mis­takes like this can cost you your ass!


That was my first thought also. Why in the world would any­one put relax­er on wet hair? I think if this was a chain I would report to the region­al or nation­al man­age­ment. I think I would also con­tact the cos­mol­o­gy board. 

And because I would want any­one else to expe­ri­ence the shock, I would post the name of the salon, the styl­ist and the man­ag­er on this site, naturalcurlly.com, napputuality.com, twit­ter and face­book. When some­one googles or bings that shop they will know exact­ly what they are get­ting.


so true!



I am sor­ry but I do not get it why this keeps repeat­ing itself e.g. “she gave me a cut instead of trim” now you get a “kid­die relax­er” instead of a DC. That would nev­er hap­pen to me. I always take my own prod­ucts even when I was relaxed and I spoke up. If I was not hap­py you were not get­ting paid. I would be watch­ing their every move and side to the side so I can see in the mir­ror. Plus I would smell the prod­ucts just to get a feel for it in case some­thing was… Read more »

Wow. Do you want a cook­ie?
Blam­ing the vic­tim and being all “I would nev­er” isn’t help­ing any­one. Have a seat.


No but you clear­ly do! For you weak state­ment. How is that blam­ing the vic­tim??? You go and sit down some­where.

What you have pro­posed is a good solu­tion and one that I am going to fol­low should I ever find myself in the posi­tion of going to a hair salon again (which is high­ly doubt­ful). HOWEVER. I don’t think that this woman should have been blamed for not bring­ing her own prod­ucts to the hair salon. We don’t blame peo­ple who get sal­mo­nel­la or oth­er forms of food poi­son­ing because they “should have known to bring their own food to a restau­rant” or for peo­ple who suf­fer from poor care at the hands of oth­er pro­fes­sion­als whether they are doc­tors… Read more »

Mina that was fun­ny, “bring your own food to a restau­rant”. but good anal­o­gy, this def­i­nite­ly wasn’t that woman’s fault. a shame that one would have to be on their guard in a place that is charged to do hair.

so true, I’m ashamed of these styl­ist. (as a nat­ur­al hair pro) They shouldn’t touch their hair if they don’t want to deal with it or under­stand it. I would have been off the chain in that salon the sec­ond my scalp start­ed BURNING. They could have done some very seri­ous dam­age to her scalp. Espe­cial­ly if they were apply­ing it like a con­di­tion­er instead of a relax­er. (usu­al­ly mas­sage con­di­tion­er it my clients hair) and then if they wer­ent wash­ing the active chem­i­cals out prop­er­ly. Which I’m sure they weren’t since they were try­ing try­ing to fool her into… Read more »
I NEVER blamed (this word is being used too much in these com­ments) her. This is how wild­fire spreads when peo­ple dont read things properly.I was quite upset hear­ing this again not real­is­ing until some­one point­ed it out this sto­ry was out in 07 I had heard of the sto­ry some time ago though and thought not again smh. The client should nev­er be blamed,obviously. Hav­ing said that not all styl­ists are bad but like I said some­one may not be on point that day. There has to be some­thing in place for cus­tomers and a pro­ce­dure we can take.If any­one… Read more »
Where did I blame the lady if I was doing that I would have addressed her direct­ly. I said I do not get why this hap­pens not blam­ing her but why are the styl­ists still doing this?? I was stat­ing what I have done before and would do con­cern­ing my hair. I can only speak for my hair. So next time please read prop­er­ly. If Jaz could get it oth­ers should too. What would I gain by blam­ing any­one? Will it make my hair grow?? So your state­ment is redun­dant as per the “should have known to bring…” smh I… Read more »

I don’t believe that she was blam­ing the lady for not tak­ing in her own prod­ucts, but she was shar­ing her expe­ri­ences and what she would do at the salon.

Sor­ry, but she does seem to be doing that in the first part of her response, you should read it again: ” I am sor­ry but I do not get it why this keeps repeat­ing itself e.g. “she gave me a cut instead of trim” now you get a “kid­die relax­er” instead of a DC. That would nev­er hap­pen to me. I always take my own prod­ucts…” That is great that she had the fore­sight to do that, but I will reit­er­ate what I wrote ear­li­er: if you are pay­ing for a ser­vice you should not have to go to… Read more »

Sor­ry but you mis­in­ter­pret­ed what I meant. I was refer­ring to these bad prac­tices occur­ring again and again and espe­cial­ly in a place where you are meant to have a pro­fes­sion­al ser­vice. Sure you should not have to go to such mea­sures but bet­ter safe than sor­ry.


Thank you at least you got my statement.I am glad there are peo­ple like you. Clap clap. 

She must have missed the “How­ev­er, that is just me” part smh.


I hope it hasn’t come to that (need­ing to bring your own prod­ucts). This is sup­posed to be a pro­fes­sion­al ser­vice.


This is not the first time peo­ple would bring their own prod­ucts it is not a new prac­tice. Peo­ple even get charged cheap­er for bring­ing their own products.I know what prod­ucts work on my hair I would rather use that than some­thing that may not work well on my hair. 

I would hope it does not but for me bet­ter safe than sor­ry. “sup­posed to be” that is it right there but unfor­tu­nate­ly this as we know is not always the case.


WOW. i know not all salons are like the one in this arti­cle but it makes me very appre­hen­sive about going in to get my hair done.


+ 1




Uhh, can we say seri­ous ass whoop­ing?




This is very uneth­i­cal. Can’t some­thing be done about this?

hon­est­ly I would have wrung their necks, kicked them in the butt repeat­ed­ly then shaved their heads. I would have gone incred­i­ble hulk on them and I am not even kid­ding. Just because it’s hair doesn’t mean all the months of hard work in main­tain­ing its beau­ty should be thrown down the drain because of some rub­bish of a salon. If I want­ed a perm I’d ask for it. Damn them and I am not even kid­ding. For real, I’d sue them, for emo­tion­al griev­ance and fal­si­fy­ing infor­ma­tion. In no way did the woman ask for a relax­er, so she… Read more »

I burst out laugh­ing at this because its so true.


yes, this is grounds for a major beat­down and a law­suit. she has to cut off all her hair and start again. Nope, i wouldve wiped the floor w some­ones face. this is why i stopped going to salons. they real­ly dont know how to do nat­ur­al hair. and the nat­ur­al salons are too damn expen­sive. $80 for some two strand twists? thats bs.

Bella Duafe

I think you have start­ed some­thing! I live in Atlanta and there are tons of nat­ur­al hair care salons, all of them charg­ing any­where from 60 to 80 for two strand twist or some vari­a­tion of that. There is even a salon here that requires a deposit at the time of your appoint­ment! I want to have the expe­ri­ence of being in someone’s chair tak­ing care of my hair, but it’s becom­ing too expen­sive and it doesn’t last. I can get maybe a week, week and a half from most places! I’m on #teamover­it!!!


Not as bad as $90 for only a trim!!!!


Wow, how do they jus­ti­fy $90 for a trim???


or $100 to start locs PLUS $90 every 4–6 weeks to main­tain them. you cant win for los­ing :-/



I am thank­ful to have a nat­ur­al hair salon near my house that I can trust and is cheap. I’m flab­ber­gast­ed at the prices. For a trim it’s like 5 to 10 bucks. For twists it’s 35 dol­lars on tues­day. How awe­some is that?

Just as I am

Very, since the only salon I know of that caters to nat­ur­al hair charges extra for wash­ing, blow dry­ing and trim­ming if your hair is nat­ur­al.
And I still end­ed up with split ends.

You’re very lucky.


@ Chim­my, whats the name of the salon? I go to one that’s a lit­tle far from me but worth it. The first time I sat in the chair I felt right at home with my styl­ist. They’re about aver­age priced for my area esp. since their in a prime time spot.


I live in Indi­anapo­lis, In and the salon is called Nat­u­ral­ly U, It’s a pret­ty nice salon. The lady that did my big chop was as talk­a­tive as I was, but then the lady who did my twist when I had gone a sec­ond time to the salon was soo qui­et, I get ner­vous around qui­et peo­ple lol.


this this THIS!!!!! you have a law­suit for real, they did some­thing irre­versible to your hair that you did NOT ask for under false pre­tens­es. omg, i can’t explain how incred­i­bly angry i’d be


YOU MUST SUE THEM. They need to be pun­ished for thi­er reck­less behav­ior, and you can help pro­tect oth­er nat­u­rals who may unwit­ting­ly vis­it that salon. OMG!


Wow! I am not shocked one bit. Sad!! I guess it can hap­pen any­where but I only go to salons that cater to nat­ur­al hair. It is an atmos­phere where nat­ur­al hair is encourged and cel­e­brat­ed! “Reg­u­lar” salons hate to see me walk­ing through the door with my huge nap­py Afro! :)


Since I BC’d, this has been one of my biggest fears, which is why I’m skep­ti­cal of going to salons, even the nat­ur­al ones. The life les­son here is that no one is going to treat your hair as well as you would. Sit­u­a­tions like these could be eas­i­ly avoid­ed if more women real­ized this.


WTF??? I’m blown for her…I would’ve went OFF…how dare they! The igno­rance of some folk still gets me. SHM!!!!