I am pret­ty vocal about pro­mot­ing the idea of per­son­alised hair care. This is the view that hair is indi­vid­u­al and while we can have a list of best prac­tice ideas, the only method to guar­an­tee suc­cess is to lis­ten to your own hair’s likes and dis­likes. I think that there are some peo­ple who like to com­pare their hair to oth­ers and in my view, this can be help­ful but it can also harm­ful. In my view, your nat­u­ral jour­ney should real­ly have your own stamp on it, do not let it be a com­pe­ti­tion to match or out­do some­one else. Here are 4 rea­sons why nat­u­ral hair is not a com­pe­ti­tion:

1. Not every­thing you see on YouTube is real

I have seen many peo­ple get dis­cour­aged by YouTu­bers for because some appear to be able to retain a mas­sive amount of length in a short time. The truth is, although some peo­ple may indeed have above aver­age growth, those who are suc­cess­ful at retain­ing length when they pre­vi­ous­ly did not, have actu­al­ly done their research. You end up see­ing a pret­ty 3 min­ute clip where hair goes from shoul­der length to mid back but the real­i­ty is real­ly much more than that. It is not pos­si­ble, at least not in a mild­ly inter­est­ing way, to cap­ture all the hours spent reading/googling on how to retain length, the sev­er­al hours of detan­gling or pro­duct hunt­ing nor the months and months spent in pro­tec­tive styling.

A good video will be edit­ed to show you the best bits. Very few peo­ple will show you their fail­ures.

2. Your hair does not need to be curly to be pret­ty
Why can’t my hair curl up like that?’ or ‘It takes ages to look half decent with my hair.’ If I am being total­ly hon­est, you do not need curly hair to feel pret­ty, you can make the deci­sion to believe you are pret­ty regard­less. How­ev­er, switch­ing back to hair, the nat­u­ral tex­ture of your hair real­ly IS what it is. You can­not adjust it, it will keep grow­ing out that way. Even the girls with curly hair will not always have per­fect curls, frizz will hap­pen and if you read num­ber 1, you will know that you will not see that in a video.

You absolute­ly can and should be able to admire a tex­ture that is dif­fer­ent from your own. How­ev­er, if you can­not look in the mir­ror and grad­u­al­ly over time learn to like your own hair, you will be paving the way for a life­time of inse­cu­ri­ty.

3. Your hair WILL grow longer, stop think­ing it will not

I think my hair is always going to be short, all my fam­i­ly mem­bers have short hair, my hair always breaks when I comb or style it,’ or Why can’t we just accept African hair can­not get that long, she is mixed.’ I know that despite the best of infor­ma­tion out there, the truth is that some peo­ple real­ly just believe their hair can­not grow longer. This is a ter­ri­ble thing because many of the­se peo­ple sim­ply stop work­ing on the errors that could fix the prob­lem.

It is not a com­pe­ti­tion, your hair may take more work and time to retain length com­pared to some­one with a looser tex­ture or a thick­er strand, but if your goal is long hair, it IS very achiev­able with the right recipe.

4. Hair typ­ing is not that seri­ous, in fact it is pret­ty ran­dom
Oh it real­ly does pain me when I see tex­ture wars. ’ I’m a type 4a’.….….‘Oh no, you are def­i­nite­ly 4c with a bit of 4b.’ Seri­ous­ly who cares? Do you know that 3c and 4c were made up by the online com­mu­ni­ty? If you are using a store-bought con­di­tion­er, it is like­ly it was test­ed on straight Cau­casian hair. Hair real­ly is just a fibre and it is real­ly more impor­tant to know what can soft­en your hair for flex­i­bil­i­ty when styling, what can mois­turise your hair well enough, what can add strength if nec­es­sary to your hair and what can fix any styling dam­age. Read­ing ingre­di­ent lists will help you pick your prod­ucts, not know­ing your hair type.

You are also bet­ter off know­ing how thick the indi­vid­u­al strands of your hair are, the lev­el of shrink­age of your hair when wet and the over­all den­si­ty of your hair. The­se things will help you to know how to han­dle your hair and whether you need pro­tec­tive styling or not. What­ev­er hair type you have, it is won­der­ful pro­vid­ed you are tak­ing care of it.

Ladies, how do you view your nat­u­ral hair jour­ney? Do you some­times see it as a com­pe­ti­tion?

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43 Comments on "Natural Hair is not a Competition"

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DJ Barbi Doll

ps, going to You Tube for Hair Info.…REALLY??? omg

DJ Barbi Doll

ummm whats with every­one want­i­ng long hair??? It is so weird to me. If that is your idea of beau­ty (sounds like it is) then that is sad.…I know some pret­ty beau­ti­ful peo­ple with short hair cuts or just short hair…


Because it is hard to attain.