by Cas­san­dre of

Huh? Who in the world is scream­ing at me?? I heard the voice again.

“Your hair F*#!’in ROCKS!!!” I looked around. It was then that I final­ly spot­ted the Cau­casian male who had to poke his head out from the driver’s seat win­dow, in traf­fic, to pay me that com­pli­ment. It’s prob­a­bly been the 8th time today that I’ve received either an admir­ing look, an “I love your hair!”, or an “African queen” com­ment about my lus­cious afro as I walked along Pine Street. It’s a reg­u­lar occur­rence for me to get com­ments on my hair, but this time things are just a lit­tle bit dif­fer­ent. My nat­u­ral hair near­ly reach­es my tail­bone in length.

Screen shot 2013-10-16 at 9.36.07 PM

See the length check video here.

How­ev­er, that’s not exact­ly what’s bring­ing home the com­pli­ments. Today, I’m wear­ing my col­or 2, 10 inch Beshe wig.

cassandre beshe wig

That’s right. All the com­pli­ments about my hair are asso­ci­at­ed with the wig I’m wear­ing on top of it. A cou­ple of weeks ago my mom came to vis­it us in Seat­tle.  Rather than going through the process of styling my thick mane after a sleep­less night with baby, I thought it was a per­fect time to wear my wig. Up until a few days before, I had nev­er ever worn a wig, nor even con­sid­ered ever wear­ing one. I was brought up with the idea that you should only wear your own, real hair. I had nev­er worn faux exten­sions grow­ing up and I first shared my inter­est in them when I wore Mar­ley twists back in sum­mer 2012

See my Mar­ley twist video here:

When my mom saw me with my “new hair,” she had absolute­ly no idea that it wasn’t mine. She didn’t blink twice. Well actu­al­ly, she did, but it was relat­ed to the length of the hair not the hair itself. An hour into our con­vo, I asked, “Do you like my wig?” She respond­ed with a rather bemused look and asked, “Why are you wear­ing a wig?” Here’s what I told her in a nut­shell

  • It’s con­ve­nient because I can achieve a pret­ty look with­out invest­ing loads of time to styling because let’s be real, you prac­ti­cal­ly have to sched­ule show­ers when you’re a mom and any­thing that’s an easy time saver is a God send.
  • I can sat­is­fy my urge for a new look with­out a long-term com­mit­ment.
  • See #2 ?
    I’m in that stage in my nat­u­ral hair jour­ney where I feel I’ve arrived. I’ve final­ly embraced this love­ly, kinky head of hair of mine and learned to nur­ture it so it has grown healthy and long. But, I want to have my cake and eat it too. I want the con­ve­nience and styling oppor­tu­ni­ties that wigs afford with­out hav­ing to com­pro­mise the integri­ty of my nat­u­ral hair.

    Screen Shot 2014-06-02 at 1.43.52 PM

    Despite my resolve, I must admit- when com­pli­ment­ed on my “hair” I feel a lit­tle torn and may­be guilty since I’m keep­ing up with a pre­tense that just isn’t true. I am in fact wear­ing a wig. I’m not gonna lie though, I hate when ladies feel com­pelled to ask you about your hair when they know it might not be yours just so they can shame you by shar­ing your busi­ness with every Tom, Dick and Har­ry. I say assume it’s hers until she tells you oth­er­wise!


    What do you think of me “com­ing clean” and con­fess­ing to admir­ing strangers that my lush, 10 inch, afro is fake? Do you have any hang-ups about nat­u­rals wear­ing wigs and faux hair?

    Cas­san­dre Bec­cai: Just anoth­er nat­u­ral­is­ta play­ing by my own rules!


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    55 Comments on "True Life: I Wear A Wig Even Though My Natural Hair Is Tailbone Length"

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    Jeannette (Tyra's Nana)
    Jeannette (Tyra's Nana)

    Cas­san­drea, IT IS YOUR HAIR! You paid for it! (smile) Jokes aside… Stay­ing beau­ti­ful 24/7 under a busy sched­ule in your life, espe­cial­ly with a lil one is dif­fi­cult for many. Choos­ing an alter­na­tive help and look an espe­cial­ly after receiv­ing numer­ous com­pli­ments, why change the habit. Wear your hair in any­way you choose to please your­self. The pres­sure of “look­ing good” requires pleas­ing alter­na­tives. There is no shame in the truth!


    Jeanet­te- you’re right. I remem­ber feel­ing unat­trac­tive for a cou­ple of months after hav­ing baby because I wasn’t able to take care of myself as I would’ve liked. The wig real­ly helps me to stay true to me in the sense that I can out on a nice do and know that I look god with­out hav­ing to try so hard. Thanks for your com­ment :)


    Say “Thank you” and keep it mov­ing :)


    ha! My hus­band very much agrees with this sen­ti­ment.